I think it's safe to say our two favourite handhelds are both in pretty much full-swing right now. Nintendo for instance, has not only just
reinvented its DS as a swanky new stylish gadget of the future via the new DS Lite model, but release-wise it's also about to play host to a brand new adventure starring the company's oldest and most revered mascot to boot; good old Mario.
 | | Mario is back! But with a new contender to the throne thanks to Sony, does he still have what it takes? |
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New Super Mario Brothers is exactly what its title hints at. Princess Peach has been kidnapped once again, and it's up to Mario to put his Italian mob connections to good use and track her down from rival Jersey gang "Da Koopas". Or something to that effect, I wasn't paying too much attention. Although Mario has whored himself out to everything from football games to a Dance Dance Revolution spin-off at this point, it's actually been four years since his last full-blown platform outing though. Heck, even that game - Super Mario Sunshine - could be argued as not a
true Mario game in the traditional sense, oddly focusing more on the fat plumber's new found ability to spray ominous fluids around, than his good old jumping and bone crushing techniques.
Enter New Super Mario Brothers then. Not only does it go straight back to the core of what a Mario game is - the jumping, the bopping, the popping of magic mushrooms - but it even bypasses the all-important switch to 3D found in pretty much every single game of the past 10 years. As a result, this is pretty much the ultimate trip back in time for the old skool Mario fan like myself. A genuine 2D Mario platformer just like back in the day. As I've said in the past, the original NES Mario game was the single title that turned me into a console fiend all those years ago...hence I've sat here awaiting this title with quite some anticipation, complete - of course - with many the bottle of KY.
But what about the PSP? Attempting to steal a wad of that 2D platforming thunder, Sony just released its own brand new platforming series here in Europe, titled LocoRoco. The game won't hit America or even Japan until later this year, but based on the strength of everything I'm about to say, I'd say it's definitely worth an import for all you foreigners. That said, the term "platformer" can really only be used in its loser definitions when describing this game, as although you are indeed jumping around on a 2D plain, it's a hell of a lot more original than that...
I'd be lying if I said I understood the plot, the setting, or what the hell was even going on half the time, but it matters not...LocoRoco is about more than these irrelevant traits. As a crazy yellow blob, rolling and bouncing around a gorgeous cartoony universe in an attempt to save the world from the evil Mojas, it's simply Japanese craziness at its absolute best. Artistic, non-sensical, and utterly captivating all at once. It truly is the video gaming equivalent to licking funny coloured toads and going wondering through the forest in the middle of the night.
While both are unquestionably ace titles then, the real question is...has Sony finally managed to one-up Nintendo at their own game? Which of these high profile, long-awaited platform beauties walks away the winner? It's face-off time, and you've got yourself a ring-side seat! Round one...
Graphics
Winner: LocoRoco
Due to its massively beefed up specs, squaring the PSP off against the DS graphically has always been a bit of a lopsided battle, yet with the recent advent of the Lite, I must say the DS' library is now looking far better than ever. In fact, recent DS titles like Metroid Prime and Mario Kart now come across almost looking like PSP games on that marvellous new sex-tinged screen.
 | | Loco's Jap art style really stands out |
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New Super Mario Bros doesn't fare
quite so tasty as the aforementioned, but it's still rather striking and beautiful in its own right. Nintendo have gone straight back in time for its art design - it looks hugely similar to the very first Super Mario game - yet in terms of technical quality it remains quite contemporary, opting for full polygon models instead of sprites, and wonderful animation, backgrounds and water physics that also surprise for a handheld game. It certainly blows away the old SNES and NES Mario titles for that reason, and for its subject matter, is about as good as you could ever hope for, frankly.
Where LocoRoco betters it however, is in pure art direction. Mario seems to be kinda cruising at this point, not really straying from the tried and tested look and feel of its past 20 years, while Loco decides to show you something you've never, ever seen before. It's bold and simple, yet rich and vibrant. Actually it feels like a bunch of toddlers have gone haywire with some crayons on your PSP screen, but in a way that's both charming and glorious. Although similarly 2D, it offers up amazingly complex liquid physics and a full on 60 frames per second that never falters for one second. It's another Katamari, essentially, yet I'd say looks way better than that ever did.
Sound
Winner: LocoRoco
This for me, is a no brainer. Mario is a series that's always sounded great, but solely due to its long running history and subsequent emotional investment. We grew up hearing those tunes and giggling at them power-up sounds, and with each passing instalment, hearing those same themes on each slab of brand new hardware has always made us Mario fans a wee bit wet down there.
 | | The ice worlds are not only stupidly fun to play and slide around, but also sound absolutely amazing to boot |
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It's disappointing then to find New Super Mario Brothers opting for brand new ditties that lack this emotional investment, with the new tunes never really sucking you in like the old classics did. On top of that, the more we hear Mario talk, the less cool he seems, and there are choice points in this game where you wish he'd just shut the hell up already. A little disappointing on the audio side then, Mazzer.
LocoRoco's sound though, is borderline flawless. Not only is the music absolutely exceptionally awesome, but Sony have even concocted an entirely new language for the Loco's themselves in this game. You'll hear them sing to each other, yell as they get separated, and even cry as evil enemy Mojas approach...all in a completely original alien tongue, that kinda sounds like baby humans cross-bred with kittens (now there's a fetish I could get on board with).
It's all wonderfully originally, cutesy stuff, that comes across as utterly inspired, and with far more depth than say, the Animal Crossing language, making the sound, in my opinion, LocoRoco's stand-out trait. The music on the ice level in particular just makes me wanna roll around on the floor, naked, while laughing.
Gameplay
Winner: LocoRoco
 | | Your Locos can be (somewhat hilariously) split up at will, which proves useful in tackling different puzzles along the way |
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Loco is an incredibly simple game, really. You tilt the world via the top two triggers - using the physics to move your blob around - while tapping them simultaneously makes him jump. You hop around, solve puzzles, and can also split your full size Loco into lots of mini Locos for squeezing through tight spots and the like, but beyond that, it's amazingly simplistic. Navigating the world is less of a challenge as a result of this, and more of an experience, in that you're never really stuck knowing how to proceed or what to do next. It's incomplex, it's easy, and it's bloody good fun.
Easy and simple it may be though, but don't make the mistake of thinking there's nothing
to this game. The beauty of the levels in fact, are really the secrets. It's a piece of piss to whiz through from start to finish, but the brilliance of the level design and the true challenge of the game lies in tracking down all those collectibles. There are literally hundreds of different goodies to find on every stage - a good half of which tend to be hidden - yet the worlds are so incredibly well designed that it makes hunting down these hidden areas so much freakin' fun. Stumbling across secret passages and alternate-routes almost happens by accident at times, and it's filled with this amazing sense of satisfaction that forces you to replay levels ad nauseam, tracking down every last hidden nugget that you can.
 | | For his latest handheld adventure, Mario snatches various different elements from all his previous platform outings |
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Throw in the zany trampoline bits, some Sonic-style super speed charges and the exceptional use of water slides, and you have a rollercoaster of gaming goodness that's freakin' impossible to put down.
Super Mario is similarly easy to pick up and play, if only due to the fact that we've bounced around this world so many times it's become second nature at this point. In a way, it's an amalgamation of every Mario title yet. So we have opening levels that look absolutely identical to the original Super Mario Brothers, mixed with the overhead inter-level maps and segregated worlds of Super Mario 3. Mario himself however, is nicked straight out of Mario 64, with wall-jumping, butt stomping and the extra abilities old skool Mario never had the chance to enjoy. Conspicuously missing in all this is Yoshi, and I would have loved to have mounted that green galloping gay dinosaur in the 2D realm once again - if only to add a little more depth to the proceedings here.
They do try to chuck one or two minor new ideas into the age old mix - your tightrope walking, your deforming terrain and even some super bad arse new power-ups that turn Mario into a giant temporarily - but ultimately this is business as usual in the grander scheme of things, and we've kinda seen it all before. Jumping on Koopas, bashing coin boxes, swimming through water levels, you know the drill. It's all classic Mario stuff, but could have used just a smidgen more originality in the level design I feel.
I was also gutted not to see the more "epic" Mario environments at the forefront here, such as those crazy ghost ships and the mammoth lava filled dungeons of the previous games. That stuff is in here on very rare occasions, but not up to the quality or quantity I was hoping for. I always dug the heck out of these levels in Mario 3 and Super Mario World - they are the true highpoints of the series in my book - yet here Nintendo opt for the more conventional, traditionally "sunny" Mario levels, with Goombas and drainpipes and all the usual pap. Just entering the final world as I am now, maybe these "darker" levels will finally rear their face, but so far they've been all but non-existent, which is a real bummer for me.
On the whole, while Mario plays about as tight as it ever has, it's kinda d?j? vu from beginning to end, while Loco feels fresh and interesting in comparison. Both are amazingly fun, but for that reason alone, Loco takes it.
Longevity
Winner: Draw
 | | Finding all these hidden little bastards will take you quite a while, trust me. As a result, Loco has some very long-lasting legs |
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As I just mentioned, Loco is piss easy, but that's not to say it won't last you a good long while. The fun comes in the replayability; digging out all those secret items, unlocking more of the bonus features and blazing through each level as fast as humanly possible. It's arguably a game designed for speed run freaks, keeping tallies of all your best times for future reference and further replayability.
In addition, there are 1 or 2 fab little mini-games you can unlock - including a fairground style grabber among others - used to win pieces of furniture and architecture as prizes. These are in-turn used in the unlockable level editor, as well as an entirely separate "Loco House" puzzle mode. The level editor even lets you share your creations ad-hoc style with other players, which is exceptionally cool in its own right, but the sadly missing ability to also upload these levels to a central online database would have all but perfected Loco's feature set. Still, there's plenty here to keep you going for months. Heck, there's even a full-blown screenshot feature and a photo album (every shot on this page was taken by myself).
 | | With just one or two new twists and very little else, New Super Mario feels like the same old, same old...yet still rocks |
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Mario is similar in many ways. It's far from the plumber's toughest adventure yet, and clockable in a solid day's play. You will, however, miss out on half the levels, which are hidden away through alternate paths, in a way hugely similar to Super Mario World's old setup. Replaying earlier maps, tracking down those secret passages, and figuring out your way into these hidden worlds holds the key to the game's longevity, and it's a rare title that I can tell you right now I won't even think about putting down 'til I've clocked every last one of 'em. This is no Super Mario World in its length - far from it - but it
will keep you occupied for a good long while never the less.
When you do eventually dive onto that final end of level flag, the game throws in some wee little bonus mini-games of its own to keep you occupied beyond. Although the main game fails to in any way make use of the DS' unique abilities - touch pad and second screen use are minimal to non-existent - these mini-games seem thrown in to appease the stylus jockies who want to put them to better use. The downside? Most of them are ripped directly out of Mario 64 DS. This is a bit of a rip-off if you ask me, but if nothing else, there are one or two nice new additions to the line-up and some minor tweaks to the old games that make their presence feel worthwhile. Not to mention some wireless multiplayer craziness to partake in too.
Overall Winner: LocoRoco
All in all, both packages provide not only awesome main games in their own right, but an alarming amount of bonus content and shelf life too. Super Mario Brothers does what it does best, and don't by any means take the above results as a sign of it lacking in any huge way. LocoRoco is just such an amazing, timeless and beautifully original concoction of joy though, one that Mario - as pleasing as it is - almost doesn't stand a chance against I'm afraid. It really is that effin' good.
 | | Despite a strong showing from Mario, LocoRoco stands alongside Tetris as one of the sweetest handheld titles ever made. Buy |
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Sony really needed this game right now. With all the killer titles and hardware improvements that the DS has been knocking out lately, a new Mario game had the potential to all but bury the PSP indefinitely. Due to Loco though, Sony have not only deflected the DS' advances, but arguably pushed out in front once again. It is quite possibly one of my personal fave handheld games ever.
Either way, after some shaky starts on both machines, between the above games - not to mention the likes of Daxter, Syphon Filter, Metroid Prime Hunters and Animal Crossing - things are certainly on the up for both the PSP and the DS. Competition certainly breeds results, and we're finally starting to reap those right now. I personally am just happy as Larry that there are two kick arse gaming handhelds out, both finally delivering the goods in their own, unique ways.
Now fuck off, I've got Mojas to murder.
